After this day I’ve had, I would like to put something out on the inter-webs:
Never discount the details of your life.
The roommate, her friend, and I were driving to the airport talking about relationship problems and on the way passed the immediate aftermath of a giant car accident. One car was rolled over, one smoking, and the friend says, “Well that puts things into perspective. Oh, here I am whining about so and so.”
You know what I say? Whine about love. Get mad at your boss. Celebrate little victories. Don’t answer the call from the person who was two-faced. Don’t eat the cake if you’re dieting. Eat the cake. Feel frustrated when someone is doing something you want to be doing with their lives. Be excited about your upcoming vacation. These are the details of your life. They make you who you are, they are what happens so that you grow and learn, they are what make the memories.
The big issues will persist. The big life changes will occur. But what happens in between determines how you handle the rest. Never discount the details of your life.
10 Signs That You Take Yourself Too Seriously
1. You are often offended or shocked by things, especially things that didn’t even happen to you.
2. You comment regularly on how other people are doing things with a mocking, yet slightly longing tone.
3. You say, “Oh, I don’t do that,” “Oh, that’s not me,” “That’s just how I am,” or “Well, THEY can do what THEY want but…”
4. You have a hard time laughing at yourself because you rarely even catch the joke. So you find yourself laughing uncomfortably while looking for an explanation. Example: “*laughs awkwardly* Wait what? What does that mean?”
5. Your voice has a general upper inflection like you’re always asking a question because what you are really saying is, “Do you understand with me?” “Do you agree with me?” “Are you my mama?”
6. You ignore people, tell your friend how much you like their crush’s new girlfriend/boyfriend, boss everyone around, or give unsolicited opinions on someone’s appearance or relationship, and then find yourself wondering why nobody has called in a while.
7. You make fun of philosophical, artistic, and focused people for being too “deep” and then have a mental breakdown about getting a bad color job on your hair or the wrong latte.
8. Your social circle doesn’t stray from the same race/economic class.
9. You ignore things that are unpleasant and rarely get personal. “What homeless guy?” or “I don’t have parents or a past…”
10. You say, “No offense, but…”
Having best friends is great. Your twenties would be no fun without having someone to care about your well-being…
Someone who cares about your future: “You have ten minutes to change out of your yoga pants, we’re going out… do you want to die alone?”
…about your health: “Okay so, if we split…
24 Things I’ve Learned in 24 Years
With a big bday coming up on November 15th, here is a list of things I’ve learned so far…
Live your truth. Decide what matters and follow it with room for error.
Because we’re all just human. You can’t be everything to everyone especially all at once. The people who matter don’t mind.
So choose to have people in your life who understand that you’re flawed and love you anyway. Your friends will hurt you and disappoint you, but the good ones are worth suffering for.
Make sure you’re suffering for people who would suffer for you. Or make sure you’re giving your love to people who can give equally to you. Giving all your time to grown people who haven’t learned to reciprocate is wasteful and doesn’t help you shine.
And it’s important to shine. Shrinking for others is not only useless, but you miss out on chances to find what you’re truly passionate about when you’re busy fearing your own awesomeness.
You have to take all the chances you can. You have to tell that person that you love them, you have to go to that interview, you have to stand up to that bully.
Always stand up to the bully. Confrontation isn’t as scary as wishing that you’d stood up for yourself. If you’re experiencing an injustice or discomfort that can be changed or brought to attention via words, use your words.
Just make sure that your words are used for good and not evil. Don’t throw around insults and judgment to those you love and watch what words you put into the universe. Your words come back to you through the universal law.
Heed universal law. What you put out, you get back. Manifest your destiny through a positive attitude and honest outlook.
Because attitude is everything. You can’t control other people, but you can control how you let them affect you and how you react to circumstances.
But sometimes you can’t control it. Whatever it is. And that has to be okay too. If you could control everything, you would never be surprised.
And you have to be surprised by life. Things will happen so much better than you imagine them to happen if you let the universe steer the outcome. Sure, you can help it along by dreaming.
In fact, you HAVE to keep dreaming. How else will you keep a vision in mind of what you truly love.
What you love is whatever your mind wanders to on a regular basis. If you can’t get that person or idea out of your head, it’s worth looking at why that is.
In fact, if you really listen to what people are saying to you, you’ll know what’s on anyone’s heart or mind in any given moment.
Just don’t get so caught up in words that you ignore people’s actions and forget to pay attention to what they DO. People can say anything and do the total opposite. It happens all the time, every day. You shouldn’t put up with a bunch of that from anyone.
But sometimes you do need to cut people some slack and understand that as human as you are, so are they.
Because we’re all human, they’ll also understand that sometimes we all need help. So don’t be afraid to ask for it. It’s so easy to become so independent that you make dumb choices to avoid being dependent on another or to be a martyr and never get what you need.
You have to ask for what you need from someone. Especially in relationships. You have to set expectations, especially if they’re repeatedly not being met.
Just make sure you’re taking care of the needs that you can take care of. Don’t sacrifice your health and happiness because you’re “too busy” or “too tired” or “too broke.” You won’t have all the time in the world.
So make sure you spend your time wisely. It’s so hard to be productive all the time, but focusing on your priorities keeps your glass filled more than trying to add more and more secondary things to the equation.
Prioritize your health, your family, your friends, your survival, and your biggest passions. That’s a lot all by itself, so make sure that whatever else you prioritize really deserves your attention.
And be grateful. That’s the most important of all. Be grateful, always, and trust that in your gratitude is a future full of more possibilities for gratitude.